Tuesday, January 15, 2008

"The Athiests!" next, on FOX

I was reminded of the FSTDT top 100* today and browsed some of the top entries. The following script of life with THE ATHIESTS twisted my nipples just right (the pictures are my little addition, otherwise it's unedited).
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Athiests as a Majority

This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!

The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men fucking eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!THE END

Scary, isn't it?

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Read the original post and the responses which followed, if you dare (to waste time).

Meanwhile, you can tell I'm spending most of the day job hunting and taking breaks from job hunting....but no worries, something much more substantive will be up later today or first thing tomorrow.

*I've no interest in this post sparking any kind of debate and I definitely am aware that these are the worst of the worst, possibly taken out of context.

4 comments:

Shawn M. said...

"Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It's no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history."
-Pat Robertson

Oliver Brackenbury said...

What's so wrong about that?

Oliver Brackenbury said...

Oh wait! Everything.

Shawn M. said...

The sad thing is, of course, that Pat "What the Fuck" Robertson has the ears of so many Americans. And then his hyperbole doubles back on itself and opens a quantum rift when he literally says that it's worse than anything by anyone ever in the history of everything!