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Shucks howdy, I sure had me some fun joining my friends Victor, Paul and Ryan in The Board Meeting yesterday. I'll share some of the pictures when I can steal'em off Victor (man I can't wait to finally get a new battery charger for my own little beast in a couple of weeks).

So yes, I didn't really finish my thoughts in the last post.

The sabbatical was a success in many ways. I distinctly remember setting myself two goals.
1) Get paid for writing.
2) Make something, anything.

I achieved both and so I guess I'm pretty satisfied! I wish I'd been able to find someone else to do the editing on Handful. As much as I enjoyed challenging myself in quite possibly my weakest area, at the end of the day I'm not trying to become an editor/tech support guy...I'm trying to become a successful writer/director! So it is without any great dismay that I've begun looking for someone to take that over and, blessedly, I got a lead yesterday that might pay off.

I can also fairly say I made pretty good use of the summer weather, there was no languishing in a beige bin while gay children busied themselves under a shining sun. I wrote a fair deal while sitting under a tree in either Kensington or Trinity-Bellwood parks and so that was another little personal goal that was met.

But man I could have done without winding up in such dire money trubbles. I guess I could have escaped them if I'd been willing to go back to temporary office work to sustain myself, but I felt that after almost two years of the shit...well it's called temporary for a reason. Even though I've ended up back in retail to rebuild my coffers, it's at least at somewhere I can feel like an adult and maybe even a little classy at times. Plus I saw a rich woman punch her husband in the gut, then face...so I guess some of my friends predictions that this would provide good writing fodder were pretty apt. My coworkers are pretty A+ too, which is always key.

But I think that the next step is to focus more on writing, get the second season of Handful made and ready to upload before the first episode is put up and to start applying for writing grants like crazy. Money from the gubbermint to live on while I scriptwrite? YES PLEASE.

Grants are a side of the industry I haven't thought about since just after I got my degree and I might have gone longer still if my pal Mark hadn't started applying for some himself. Most government grants aren't open to folk who're less than a year out of school, so that mixed with my feelings that I didn't have enough "chops" to have a chance of getting anything and led to my ignoring grants for long enough to plum forget about'em.

But it's been a couple of years and now I've got film and show ideas bursting from a fat binder and several notebooks. I've got a little bit to show, between my trailer and Handful (and that short film I've gotten paid to write, once it's made). I'd also like to think my writing has improved!

You know what, I will.

I will think that.

I've slapped together a three to four month plan and as long as I don't eventually get up to a five-year plan I think life won't feel too fleeting.

Wimmin and Werk

We men sure like to draw them! It's part of how we try to own them, own them with OUR MAGIC OWNERSHIP EYES. Neither of these are done, but both were started this weekend and I'm finally returning to the reg'lar workforce this Thursday so I don't know when I'll be finishing them.
Which I guess means my unintentionally extended writing sabbatical is over, having run about three months and three weeks. I am pretty okay with what happened, though I wish I'd done more but isn't that always the way.

Regardless of your opinions on poly-ticks

This gets oddly hypnotic!

RADIOFACE

As if in answer to my post yesterday - and I assume it is because I am AN ONLY CHILD AND THE WORLD REVOLVES ARRRRROUND MEEEE - there is this interesting episode of a new British webshow called Radioface.

To be quite honest...

....this phenomena is a big part of why I decided to leave England. I was lucky enough not to be victimized directly, but it had a profound effect on my psychological state at times and it was easy to tell when you were talking with someone who was wound up about it in one way or another - regardless of the topic actually being discussed. Folk often asked me about the cameras and what effect they had on my mindset, but really it was the effect they (and all that comes with them) had on people I interacted with.
This is also probably why I'm overly quick to get fed up with the highly reported Toronto crime "scene". Putting out thirteen trillion images and twenty kajillion words worth of media for every dick who stabs another dick doesn't do anything to make me safer, you dicks!

We all know Youtube comments...

...tend to be the lowest form of Internet discourse, just after a manatee slapping it's blubbery dick on the keyboard while reciting Mein Kampf. Check it out folks, the first highly offensive comment on a Handful video! (Speaking of which, there will be an update later today, I've decided some content with a forgivable error is better than nothing).You can go swear at this guy here, if you like. Anywho, I gotta go click "delete" now...

Turn up your speakers for this one

Do you like voice actors? Have you watched a movie trailer in the past thirty years?

MAYBE YOU'LL LIKE THIS THEN

Vicky Cristina Barcelona

So I just saw this and I think it's worth a little blather. First I'll paste in the opening plot description from Wikipedia and then we'll get to my own thoughts.
----

Vicky (Rebecca Hall) and Cristina (Scarlet Johansson) visit Barcelona for the summer, staying with Vicky's distant relative Judy (Patricia Clarkson) and her husband, Mark Nash (Kevin Dunn). A Narrator (voice of Christopher Evan Welch), present throughout the film, describes the two friends: Vicky is practical and traditional in her approach to love and commitment, and is engaged to the reliable but unromantic Doug (Chris Messina). She is in Barcelona getting her masters in Catalan Identity, a project spawned by her love of the works of Gaudí, and is emotionally moved by Spanish guitar. Cristina, on the other hand, is spontaneous and unsure of what she wants in life. She is just out of a relationship and wants to get over the bad time she had making a 12-minute film about Love.

At an art exhibition, they notice the artist Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem). Cristina is impressed with him at first sight, and grows intrigued when Judy and Mark tell the girls that the artist has suffered a violent relationship with his ex-wife, María Elena (Penélope Cruz). Later that night, the girls notice him across the room in a restaurant. He approaches their table and abruptly invites them to accompany him to the city of Oviedo, where they will sight-see, drink wine and, hopefully, make love. Cristina accepts at once, but Vicky is skeptical and refuses. She is eventually convinced however, and the pair accompany Juan Antonio to Oviedo on a small private plane during a storm...

----

First off, this is a good movie to get you talking afterwards if only because it is very difficult to watch this without being drawn to trying to figure out how much of yourself there is to be found in either of these two women who sit on different sides of the fence when it comes to love.

Secondly, even though it seems ripe for having a bunch of simple characters that embody certain arguments and nothing more...this pitfall is carefully avoided. Bardem is introduced as a musk-laden, life affirming Spanish Lothario to be sure...but as you get to know him, other sides to the man come out. The two girls may be presented by the narrator as basically being "the reckless, passionate one" and "the uptight, overly planning her life one" but they two show elements of the other (as best friends often do) while also showing sides that are something more than their core element or the exact opposite of said core.

Allen shoots their story in some of the most picturesque Spanish cityscape and countryside you'll ever see. I've often said that if you can't afford a trip to Japan, that renting Lost in Translation is a cheap substitute and I'll say the same about this film with regard to southern Spain. His knowledge of their art and architecture is frequently injected into the narrative without being overbearing or coming off as Allen wanting to show off.

His relatively hands off and trusting style of handling the cast pays off handsomely when you consider the talented roster. None of the drama slipped into melodrama and everything felt quite natural. The character of María Elena might be a bit much for some people, but I found that she was fleshed out enough for me to not just think "Here comes the crazy lady" every time she entered the room.

I've heard several people sing the old song about how "Woody Allen's finally got It back!", but given that this was said about Match Point and a few of his other films of the last fifteen years...well I just think that there are fans of his that need to move on from Annie Hall the way there are Radiohead fans who need to move on from OK COMPUTER. I feel it's a strong effort and I was pleased to see that all the work he's been doing with Scarlett Johansson seems to have helped her become a more interesting actress. Sure she's playing something of a sultry sexpot once again, but compare her character in this film to the one she played in The Prestige and I think you'll see what I mean.

I highly recommend bringing a friend with you and a partner if you've got one (certainly, judging by all the couples in the audience when I was there...I'm not the only one who thinks this is a good date movie) and to go for a meal or a drink after, somewhere you can discuss what you've just seen. Me? I'd see it again in theaters and I'm certainly going to have a peek at it on DVD if the price is nice.

----
MEANWHILE: My friend Sara got a role in a neat little music video you might like. Warning: The music is actually pretty good!

I went to a friends film fundraiser last night

and it was a good time, though both my friend and I wished more folk had come out. A lot of folk were busy, though my pal Rob still had me drop some dollars into the donation box on his behalf so hey, and the reasons were generally just.

But I caught through another friend that the reason some weren't coming was because they too led the Poor Artiste Life and that hey why should they come give money to a guy for his project when they need money for theirs?

GEE I DON'T KNOW FELLAS/LADIES, MAYBE BECAUSE ONE DAY YOU MIGHT WANT FOLK TO GIVE MONEY TO YOU?

Plus, Christ, it's not like these sorts of wingdings happen every day of the week or the suggested donation was more than the cost of seeing a movie - hell, it was actually a chunk less than going to see something at the AMC. Oh well!

It certainly got me thinking about what I'll do in months to come. I'm loathe to commit to anything just now, as I'm still wrapping up a couple of things, but I know that I want to push forward the feature length making of Tonight We Fall In Love. It's a fair guess that I'll need to raise "money" in ways other than tugging on the arms of organizations or individuals with large amounts of discretionary income. Heh, it'd be nice to think that Handful might have enough of a following by that point that I could raise some cash via an Obama style micro-payment dealie but that just MIGHT qualify as getting ahead of myself...especially since, though the technical problem has been solved, it was solved at a late enough point to make putting off the proper episode until next Friday a mandatory act (for the sake of quality).

I want I want I want...

Who I Am and What I Want, David Shrigley from Richard Summers on Vimeo.

I want to be able to figure out how to get around what seems to be a lighting problem in the remainder of the Handful footage so I can not have to cut the first season (already short) very very short...

I want to get onto some new projects...

I want to eat bones and shit ghosts...

Vixy

One nice side-effect of making Handful is that I have learned a great deal and found many new, useful websites in my efforts to make the show more visually interesting than just my mug in front of a brick wall. For this coming week's episode I wanted to insert a clip that I had found on Youtube. After securing permission from the owner, I had to learn that .flv is the filename suffix for all flash compressed videos hosted on Youtube and it's many compatriots. From there I learned the hard way that my editing software doesn't know what to do with the shit!

So I poked about a bit further and found this magnificent site - Vixy - which not only facilitates the downloading of online flash compressed video but it converts the bloody .flv's into far more usable formats such as .mov, .avi and the format in which I always upload the show (.mp4).

Oh, for the record, the clip I nabbed off of Youtube is not this.

Armstrong & Miller

A marvelous discovery that was passed along to me today...



The song's seem a cornerstone but they do more than that!

Hawt Dawg

Thank goodness for blogs that raid other blogs - thanks to getting linked to on Fleen, Handful has been linked to by comixtalk.com today! This also might be the beginning of my being known as a "DIY magazine show creator". Well, that's certainly not the worst title to have.

Neat

Oh hey sweet

Handful just got linked to by Fleen - this is the benefit of covering something with a bit more general appeal than cannibalistic, late '90s African warlords or polygamist cults!

WOOOOOOOO *FLOP* WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *FLOP* WOOOPWOPWOPWOPPO *FLOP*

So it occurred to me the other day that I need to get a part-time job again. Something about money? But there is also the forced structure, I think.

This is when you work.
This is when you do not work.
Do not fuck with this or we will be forced to make your limbs bend in ways they ain't supposed to and also, maybe, tell your momma convincing lies about what you do in the evening.

A useful moment of clarity hit me last night. I realized that I'd been working (on my behalf) basically 10+ hour days for eleven days straight. The show. Scripts. Job hunting all over towne. I had basically been waking up, usually after a fitful nights rest that was made so by waking up and having trouble getting back to sleep due to having Too Many Things racing around my head, and then alternating between running around at 100kph or collapsing in a heap until I was recharged enough to go back to the former.

At the start of this writing sabbatical the thing to do was make sure I didn't just laze around, write three sentences and consider it a full day. Now the pendulum has swung too far the other way. This is not apocalyptic, but I figured it's been a hundred years since I wrote a "Bloggy Bloggerton" style post and oh what a treat.

Meanwhile, both the show and that script I've been developing for a fellow have passed over their respective humps. I can now start looking at What To Do Next and it is pretty exciting! I just hope I can get a nice lil' job at a nice lil' bookstore so I can get out of the house more, interact with more strangers and basically get a little more balance going on.

ALSO
This is a pretty good read with a pretty good point.
1 2 3 4

Orange

I recently dug up this little number I did during the last Christmas holidays and stuck it in a cheap photo frame. It shouldn't be hard to believe it was inspired by a Vogue photo shoot. In it, the model had the front of her hair dyed a different color in each picture - this generally matched the background and even her clothing. I never really considered coloring in any other parts of this, but it has a sister painting which I started to fill in and my put up here later.It sucks a little, but I won't be able to do my usual weekend drawing/painting relaxation routine as I've got to be 100% ready and rehearsed to film the last episodes of Handful's first season on Sunday. Still, I'm steadily getting better at training myself to do enjoyable, productive things to relax. There is nothing fundamentally wrong with just crapping out in front of the television, video games or Internet distractions - it even sort of has to be to done once in a while - but awhile ago I set myself the goal of gradually shifting the balance of my relaxation activities from that category to the kind that leaves me with something for my efforts and I'm glad I did.

It's tricky, though, as it's not enough to do something productive - you have to make sure you're not getting lost down the path of Yet Another Skill To Try and Perfect. Otherwise the relaxation portion, the having-something-you-can-forget-about-when-you're-not-working-on-it bit, goes right out the window and then what are you doing?

I can't believe that after this Friday's Handful update we'll already be halfway through (Sept 12 will be the last update). If nothing else, this experience is certainly helping me refine my definition of what I want to do for a living.

I also can't help noticing how this blog has been transforming from a record of what I'm seeing to a record of what I make for others to see.

Hrm.

Movin' on up

Click To Play

So this Friday was the last of the episodes from our first batch of filming. I've just started looking at the footage for the next episode and the difference is like night and day - and not just because we got rid of the desk. Tonight I'm doing another interview and that too should be improved by the moderately hard-won lessons of experience.

It all makes me want to go back and call a Mulligan (or something). But oh well, it's the natural trajectory for this sort of thing. I can't think of one television series or webcomic I've enjoyed that didn't get a lot better after that initial period where the writers were still figuring out their voice and all that jazz. It would be just a tad presumptuous to think myself above this process!

"What Writers Make"

One of the trickiest things in being self-employed, or so I've learned from my parents and their many self-employed friends that I've met over the years, is setting a price for your services. You want to entice someone into hiring you or purchasing your product, but you also don't want to cheat yourself or even drive people away with prices so low they assume what you're offering is crapola.

For this last script I've been paid for, I basically did a calculation based off what I knew the producers budget to be (approx.) and what my own personal monthly expenses are. But according to the GUVVERMINT I should be charging $23.82 an hour. Well, at least until I hit 55 and then I should charge a little less as my doddering old brain won't be able to churn out tales like she used to.

Roadsworth

Getting talking with some folk at a party last night, I brought up my show and this Friday's interview with Posterchild as well as the Vespahead thing etc. One of the people I was talking about brought up a character I'd never heard about - Roadsworth. As his name suggests, all his work is done literally on the street. Apparently he was arrested a few years ago and presented with an impossible fine, which was later dropped when the city of Montreal ended up hiring him to do work for them.

Lo and behold, there is an NFB documentary on the guy - enjoy the trailer.

WIPED

So for the first time in a while I did a little sketching, from this photo. It's as if I've been shoving all my time and energy into something, lately.

But thankfully one other project is over it's biggest hump, a short script I've been putting together for a fellow who rather kindly paid me for the first draft. That certainly felt nice.

Background, Check

Here are the backgrounds for Friday's episodes, in case anyone would like a look at them without my ugly mug in the way. This is from episode one...And this is from episode two..In other news I CANNOT STOP LOOKING AT THESE PHOTOS. I want to paint every single one of them!

*Puff* *wheeze*

I just went jogging and, trust me, this comes back to scriptwriting.

When I was much younger and had made up my mind that I would spend my life writing, my Dad took notice. He came up to me and pointed at his then-rotund (and still hairy) midsection and said "Oliver, if that's what you want to do then take heed boy, take heed of what I hath wrought in my years at the bench".

I may be paraphrasing here.

But yes, like some corpulent ghost of Christmas future, dad's gut was giving me a message - those who sit down for a living are particularly susceptible to becoming grossly unfit. A few years later Dad would start going to a gym and minding his diet better, at this point in his late fifties. I'd like to think the new generation can learn from the previous one, so at twenty-six I am trying to take dad's gut's message in a little earlier. I've been able to slip by on my absurd metabolism for years but, about two years ago, I noticed a small yet perceptible slowdown - like a cheetah that notices it is still outrunning the lion but by just a little bit less each year.

Being around the home and writing or editing as much as I have these past few weeks, I began to notice another little slowdown. Add this to my meeting someone fit enough to make me do a spit-take when I saw her snare-drum of a stomach and this ends up with me pushing my little legs around the neighborhood this morning. It felt good and I stopped after the point at which it would have been embarrassing to do so. A man can't ask for much more on his first day at it (said the bishop to the actress).

Anyways, enough of that - I'd rather not be the type to exercise for one frigging morning and then spent hours waxing on about how the visceral ballet of the battle of the bulge made them feel more in tune with sister Nike. Keep an eye on this spot for some of the shit I learned while getting the show up in order.

Pretty suitable for my 500th post!

They clutter cities and countrysides. Make lots of different noises. Produce a variety of odors. The world would be very different without them. You love them, you hate them. Sometimes you make love to them while hating them

Human beings.

If you know any, please tell them all to come check out In a Handful of Minutes – the web show which reviews something other than the usual crap – and to pass it along to any human beings they might know. We have a Facebook group which may aide in this purpose! Plus you can download it as a podcast, if you'd like to see me leering at you while you're while riding the bus.

Episodes are hurriedly uploading now...

Give it up...

Somehow I found time for this...

Like a lot of watercolors, it looks best at about two feet away - but that doesn't work so well with the point n' click camera!

On the cusp...

Yes, it's finally happening - go here for some exciting news and something you should bookmark/add to your RSS feed!

I would like to politely ask that any of you who were thinking about kindly linking friends and enemies to the page to wait until the debut on Friday. Folk'll be more inclined to remember to come back if they get some proper content on arrival. What I've linked to right now? That's just for little old you.

At first I thought...

...this probably wouldn't work in a city. But maybe there's a way around the difficulties posed by a higher density population?

I don't like Russian Metal music...

Blatantly stolen from Tom.

GORBACHOV: THE MUSIC VIDEO - BIGGER AND RUSSIANER from Tom Stern on Vimeo.

....but I do like over the top tributes to Mikhail Gorbachev which re-imagine him as a zombie-fighting barbarian.

Write what you may or may not have done

I could not agree with the sentiment of panels 3 & 4 more, even if I designed a machine whose sole purpose was to augment my ability to agree.

I should be so lucky...

...as to wind up being so totally indifferent to old age as my father, who has found himself on the cover of Fifty-Five Plus magazine expressly for his choice to live like A Human and not the kind of demi-human so many folk resign themselves to being after they've been around long enough.

Addendum: I think my favorite line from the article is where Karen Secord, the author, describes my father as being "propelled by intellect, a quick wit and a fierce sense of self" (emphasis mine). Though I wouldn't argue the first two, it's that third quality which I feel really hits the nail on the head - not only as part of the assessment of my father but in identifying a necessary trait for making the most out of this quick jaunt across the Earth we've lucked into.

Transcript: AHAAAAAAHhhh....oh phew......oh ho ho HO HO HO HO HA HA HEE HEE

Holy cow I just about shit a brick! Not one hour ago I finished writing the "Webcomics: What's up with that particular medium of entertainment?" episode of Handful and then I see that Yahtzee has done an episode on webcomics.


A good episode too, mind! I watched it, I enjoyed it. But mostly I was relieved that...
1) I put up that preview of the Ryan North Interview when I did, thus proving I had the idea to do a webcomics episode on my own and that I'm not aping Yahtzee.
2) That Yahtzee focuses directly on gaming webcomics, while I'm looking at the whole spectrum.
3) He's also doing a tongue-in-cheek "How to make your own" thing, while I am taking a different tack.
4) Despite some qualifying remarks in the closing credits, he's obviously taking a big dump on Tim Buckley - which is a perfectly fair thing to do with Tim Bucklebottom - and his webcomic that serves as a perfect measure of the worst in gaming comics...particularly the comedy/drama switch thing.

Oh and uh hey I got to be in Ryan's alt text today thanks to this shirt. I knew it would be good for something other than saving people's eyeballs from bursting due to a manliness overload at the sight of my pecs.

9,000 Corsets and One Man Scratching His Head

One thing that is happening while I am building steam towards launching "Handful" is that I am looking around at other shows and trying to judge what brings in decent traffic. As I was browsing through my folder of Youtube videos I noticed something that really caught my eye - the third part of my Dirk diddling in "The Movies" currently has 9,037 views.


At first I remembered, at least seven months ago now, figuring out that somehow a bunch of members of a corset enthusiasts forum had kept tripping over it - most likely while searching out things more closely related to their joi de vive (sp?). But seven months ago it was around 900 views and wasn't toooo much further ahead of the other episodes, which you'd expect to get roughly the same amount of accidental search traffic. But for it to multpily tenfold is still pretty surprising and the contrast between it and the other three episodes is stark

Views as of this moment
Ep 1: 443
Ep 2: 979
Ep 3: 9,037
Ep 4: 679
Ep 4 Redux: 286

They all have the exact same title but for the episode number. I have to wonder what mysterious X factor I am missing! Meanwhile, the view count for my first crack at directing is currently 637 - I guess my problem was not naming it "Tonight We Fall In Corsets"? Or maybe "Tonight We Britney Nipple Slip Corset"? Surely one can take succor in the thought that, were he of the modern era, Alfred Hitchcock would have had these concerns weighing on his thick, furrowed brow.

P.S. I'm older and I didn't write a damn thing about it here? OH WELL. BLOG FAILURE I GUESS. UM, "THE DAYS SURE DO GO BY QUICK HUH?".

I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry...

Mr. Oliver Thomas Coles Brackenbury and Mr. Ry-an North

Oh ho ho....needless to say (but I'm saying it anyways, apparently!), I have edited this in something of an intellectually dishonest manner. The proper interview, and any others I do, will edited in a more straightforward and honest fashion.

Toxic Pacific

I wrote about this a little while ago, but I thought I'd point out that the VBS series on the giant plastic conglomeration in the southern Pacific gyre is now up to view.

Here's part one.

And I must stress, VBS's journalism just isn't the same creature as VICE magazine - which I find to be steadily deteriorating - and shouldn't be pre-judged on the magazine's merits. Give it a chance, I doubt you'll regret it.

Seven Words you probably can't say in Heaven

George Carlin dying can be fairly described, as I'm sure he'd say, as bullshit.

The days...

Jesus jumped up Christ I cannot believe I'm already on the last week of this six week sabbatical. I'm reminded of a cynical bit (as if Shannon Wheeler can write any other kind) from the old Too Much Coffee Man comics. Basically TMCM get's wound up about the progression of time and how it races by when he's engaged in projects (satisfying or otherwise) but that the only way to stretch it out is to waste it by doing nothing (or at least nothing personally satisfying).

I'd like to provide a rejoinder but I don't have one at the moment. Perhaps there's one in here.

Unlikely Alliance

I have to say, I'm rather keen on this "Unlikely Alliance" project by the WeCanSolveIt group. If they are still taking videos two or three weeks from now then I'd certainly like to have a go.

That's how you know!

Man, I've spent almost the entire day editing (and look to be continuing doing so until bed). About mid-afternoon I had a real "Oh good God what am I doing oh man oh lord oh geez. I should just get a simple life that I can manage, maybe where I sell half-used batteries in a store inside an incomplete strip mall located at the corner of some suburb where the children die young and their parents just can't stop fiddling with themselves in public"...moment.

That's how you know you're learning new things and pushing out against the boundaries of your abilities folks!

CLUE: The following picture is part of what I'm slap, slap, slapping together.

Last preview for now...

...if all goes according to plan, I'll be uploading the first proper episode in very early July.

Not having millions of dollars...

...with which to purchase the rights to images and clips, I've been looking through the Internet Archive, everystockphoto and PicFindr a fair bit. Just thought I'd toss them handy links out to anyone else who wants to include clips without getting lawyers calling them - it can happen even when you think you're playing it safe, such as the recent trip up of Red in Tooth & Claw accidentally getting some David Attenborough clips mixed in with their show...then having to re-cut EVERYTHING THEY'D DONE. Good times.

Good times I would like to avoid.

Meanwhile, here's my first mess around with introduction credits for the show!

I...live

So!

The shooting got pushed back to Friday (yesterday) from Saturday (....today). I think things went okay, once I got back into the swing of things after not having been in front of a camera since late December.

As I've mentioned, I'll be doing the editing for these episodes (the latter batch being shot at the end of this month) and after uploading the footage to my computer something painfully obvious finally hit me: I am going to be spending hours and hours listening to my own voice while staring at my own loverly features.

Oh.

Oh god.

I mean, pretty much everyone has at least some degree of an adversarial relationship with recordings of themselves and I am no exception. I wonder if this process will nullify or intensify that?

Improper Ollie

So I've been researching to help decide on the camera style I want for my own show and, amongst other things, I tripped over this. It's not what I'll be doing, in look or subject matter, but I appreciate the style and content all the same. It's only three minutes, so why not give'er a go.

MUTO

MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU from blu on Vimeo.
From both a street art and a film making standpoint, this impressed the hell out of me.

Onward and upward

So, much to my joy I earned the good faith of of my web collaborator to help shoot and produce a show I've been working on - a show with yours truly hosting. We're looking to shoot five episodes a week today and the remaining five of the first season (so a total of ten) two weeks after that. I've got a right laundry list of things to do in order for this to all work out and I couldn't be happier. A third of the way through this sabbatical and I feel well vindicated in my decision.

More news later, when I'm not constantly checking to see if my arse has fallen off thanks to my having been up for something like 26 hours yesterday/today and then not being able to sleep in thanks to the blind flute guy who likes to play outside my bedroom sometimes. As my pal Ryan, who had to deal with this before he moved out and I moved in, put it "How many times do I have to cure cancer before I can dump a bucket of water on a blind guy?".

Workin' in the park...

...is great when I just need to look at one or two pages at a time, but terrible otherwise (for getting work done). You just don't have the desk space! Sure there's the ground but it is not always the most friendly place for a piece of paper and there's generally a breeze or three that'll snatch it away from you.I've often wanted to just bust out a desk like John Cleese doing a "And now for something completely different" bit, even wearing an old suit to complete the image, and just set down to work like that in the middle of all the greenery and sunshine.

Maybe a breakfast-in-bed tray kind of thing? Any suggestions? These pictures are from Trinity-Bellwood Park, by the by.

Scriptwritin' Fancy-Like: Genre writing and eating your own tail.

So! As I have mentioned, the treatment I've just finished is looking to be in or at least containing elements of the film noir genre - which is a tricky beast in some ways since there is little consensus on any kind of concrete definition. Many of the films considered the height of noir are missing a few or even most of the stylistic and storytelling tropes which are associated with noir.

Meanwhile, I find there is always a danger in consciously working within a genre or applying it to a storyline, like a coat of paint. You can run the risk of forgetting to write a good story underneath all them tropes and just end up working your way through a checklist of semiotic signifiers which resonate with your own perception of what the genre is (or worse yet, what you are reading out of a book at the same time).

But as much as genre can be used as a style substitute for substance, it can spruce up what might otherwise be a less interesting story. Used this way, it's basically steak sauce and like sauce you just need to have the sense to know how much augments the meal and how much can drown it. With noir, some of the tropes (like it's use of lighting) aren't the scriptwriters concern unless he is also the director. But the dialogue, the kinds of character motivations and the tone of the story are all laid out by chumps like yours truly before being filtered through the actors, director, art director, set designer, costume designer etc etc.

The temptation to provide thick, lumbering descriptions is amplified with genre too, since the look is so much a part of what defines any genre. I'm not the first person to say this by any stretch, but if you want to read a good noir script (and a good script, period) then you could do worse than to read the one for Chinatown. Even if you're not fussed about reading the whole thing, I'd say you should check out the opening scene with Gittes in his office. This is a good illustration of why the lines of text which go underneath scene headings and wrap around dialogue are referred to as "action" lines in any script editing software you'll get your hands on. Yes the suits, the office, the background music etc all help make a film "noir" but that's not what Robert Towne was called upon to provide - he was there to provide the corruption, the desperation, the secrecy, the sordidness and the paranoia that also help to make a film fall into that category.

Anyways, I'm starting to ramble and Christ knows that there are volumes and volumes of abstract theory about this sort of thing. Me? What do I do?

While reviewing a post-apocalyptic short that I wrote a while ago, making notes to trim it down to a better length for festivals and to get it into a shape I'd feel comfortable trying to film, I started a practice which came in very useful for my work on the noir treatment. Looking through the action lines I'd ask myself first one question and then, sometimes, one other.

First: "Is this something which would be covered by another member of the crew, somewhere down the line?"

If so, then I like to jot down whose job it would be and then I ask myself...

Second: "Given that, how essential is this thing I'm describing to the plot, tone or characters? Basically, does the this line do anything or does it just add to the background?"

And then I'll remove, change or leave the line based on what answer I give myself. The only place I allow a little leeway is within the one scene which I feel sets the tone for the rest of the story (usually, but not always, the first). However, I'm not entirely sure I can defend that habit.

Another good way that I help keep myself from getting overly descriptive is to remind myself that if about one page of script equals about one minute of film and that there is a limit to how long the film can be, then do I want to take up valuable page real estate with more gripping or story a description of a chair?

Put that way, the answer is pretty obvious.

That's enough about genre for now, I'm sure I'll come back to it before I die of old age surrounded by golden idols of yours truly.

Finally, I just thought I'd note an odd experience I had while brainstorming on the treatment. The film noir aspect was first suggested by my collaborator. The burlesque side of things has been on my brain since I've met more than one person involved with the scene since I came to Toronto. So it was, with...would you call it serendipity? Well anyways, so it was with no direct intention that I was stirring around a bunch of plot points in a pot when they lined up to form an almost perfect reproduction of the first short film I ever wrote - Trenchcoats & Corsets. For those few who know of it, I'll just let you chew on that. For those who don't, I have to stress that the odds of this have always felt very astronomical to me. Though I do feel that retelling others stories can have merit, I frown the hell on it when authors of any kind begin to repeat their own work. Ah well, it wasn't on purpose and now I suppose I've gotten an interesting warning.

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Addendum: I rather like this contraption.
Also, if you want some additional proof that the great they sometimes do stumble - it's worth noting that Robert Towne also wrote (and had a role in) The Last Woman On Earth. I've got that sucker on VHS and hooooo boy....

marriedtothesea.com

Background....check!

How hot can a 'dang' get?

Well hot dang the noir treatment is done. Now to wait for a response - which might be bothersome if I didn't have ten other projects to occupy myself with! Yesterday I got a nice start on the web show work I need to have done for next week, so I reckon that's the thing to work on through the weekend. But not tonight - tonight I'm going to try and finish a painting I started, if for no other reason than that painting seems to use almost none of the same cuts of my brain as writing does and thus it makes a great way to recharge while still doing something.

I wish I'd done more in this first week, but I've done some comparisons with other things I've worked on since moving to Toronto and I still got shit done quicker and far MORE shit done in a shorter period of time - so I'm not really complaining. Plus I've needed

Meanwhile, for those who are amused by such things, here is the short playlist I listened to over and over to maintain the right mood for working on the noir treatment.

"Fly" by Luscious Jackson
"About Her" by Malcom McLaren
"Diabolus" by The Cinematic Orchestra
"Thread", "Theme to Kill a Dead Man", "Hunter", "Nylon Smile" and "The Rip" all by Portishead

Writing Sabbatical: Day Three

Holy cow and a jumped up Jesus and beans I am having a real live Learning Experience folks. That is to say, my enthusiasm for getting things done has blinded me to something I already should have known and now I'm just clearing the mist from my eyes.

Basically, without the day job to force my mind off the noir treatment I have allowed it to rattle around in my head almost every minute of every day since Friday. I have pages of notes (satisfying) and nine tenths of the story plotted out (very satisfying) but keep finding myself staring holes in my notebook when trying to figure out that last tenth (agonizing). I set myself a deadline for "Some Time Tuesday", feeling it was realistic given the amount of time I had. Setting myself deadlines I know I can meet is something I felt I had a decent handle on. But what I didn't consider is the danger of burnout (frightening - okay I'll stop this) since I haven't had this much time to work non-stop on something since my last semester at Carleton.

So I've popped off what I have to my Mandy.com collaborator and decided to try a few things to rejuvenate.

• Talk through what I have so far with my friend who's coming over for dinner.
• Catch a film noir movie at the Bloor tonight.
• Wake up tomorrow and work on the web show or at least not the treatment for the first half of the day.
  

In the remaining time of this sabbatical I think I'm going to make a point never to spend a full day on something if my deadlines allow. Burn out is burn out, regardless of the precise route you take there.

Addendum: Oh man this kind of thing is scary if you think about it for even a nano-second.

Possible holdover

This treatment is taking a little longer than expected. I'm looking at finishing it today but maybe not early enough to get a post in here before tomorrow. Just in case, I thought I'd provide this to tide you over.I just typed an obscenity into google image search, but if memory serves I think this originally came from KC Green - who is pretty okay.

Writing Sabbatical: Day Two

So here we are, day two of my Self Employed Screenwriter Simulation. So far it is okay! I like the commute but my boss is a jerk haw haw haw. Discipline has not been perfect but then hell I just started. Really, the only trouble has been rule #4 on account of social commitments I made before I knew precisely when this thing would be starting.
Yesterday was mainly research and writing. The current treatment I'm working on, for a producer/director I met through Mandy.com, is looking to be a modern film noir with heavy involvement in the resurgent burlesque scene. This made me feel less of a shit for going out to this last night, since - and I'm only half joking here - it qualified as additional research. Honestly, if I'd not gone I might have forgotten that burlesque is not just dancing and jokes but also singing...which may or not play into the treatment as I finish it up today.

So okay Mr. BigBalls why are you writing a post here if it's within your working hours? Well sir, partially this can be blamed on my spending some time learning CSS and thus my mind being put in the realm of blags. The other is to help find focus on the day's work by discussing it with you lot. My parents are self-employed and have been as long as I can remember. All through the years I've been reminded by them that one of the biggest troubles with working for yourself is discipline and focus - since you don't have a boss to enforce both. They weren't kidding! I've gone into this sabbatical with eleven writing projects at various stages, as well as the challenge of learning enough about Adobe Premiere and CSS to facilitate one of those eleven. It is tempting as hell at times to try and work on most or all of these projects at once!

Luckily, for more than one reason, I am getting paid for the project I'm working on today and that has pushed it right up the priority list. The second on the list is the final manifestation of the monologue style web show - now that I've finally found a decent hook for it - if only because I have someone willing to produce and promote the bloody thing. But the editing and web design are in my modestly capable hands and so we have me learning how to write an entirely different kind of script altogether.

Anyways, when I come out the other side of writing the treatment then a new Scriptin' Fancy-Like post can be expected. I'd like to do more of those in the coming weeks.

The Rules (for making the most of this thing)

The Rules

1) Do up individual task sheets for each project, to be kept in the front of their respective sections in the binder.

2) Morning work starts no later than 9am. Lunch is never more than an hour and never starts later than 12:30pm. PM work never starts later than 1:30pm and ends for dinner at 5:30pm-6pm. It can continue after dinner but this 3^rd period should not be counted on (re: Procrastinating).

3) Friday nights through noon Sunday are sacred. Rest, relaxation and chores must be done. Paint! Read! Go outside on the longboard!

4) Bed by 10:30pm dammit! (Sun-Thurs)

5) Walk around the block mid morning and afternoon. At least stretch legs around apartment.

6) Steady morning exercise regimen (before 9am)

7) Stay comfy! Drink lots of water, bust out the fan and air exchange unit. Also, shower first thing.

8) Lillian cannot use the phone.

9) Because she’s such a smartass, Lillian cannot go outside.

Here we go!

Well!

After some scrabbling and a very kind favor from a friend, I can finally say that my planned writing sabbatical is beginning and it begins at 5pm this Friday. I'm looking at six to eight weeks, depending on how I'm able to stretch my dollars, of getting up and scriptwriting from 9am-5pm (and probably more, but you see what I'm getting at here).

I got so exited over this that I even made an Excel spreadsheet - an EXCEL SPREADSHEET , PEOPLE -trying to plan ahead and draw up a rough schedule for the six weeks. Past the first week I can see this getting blown to hell by assorted circumstances, but as long as I'm wrapping up projects and getting the foundations laid for new ones then I'll be pretty happy. Plus I'll be able to avoid burning out, which I've seen coming at me like a monster truck for the past two weeks, from shoving what I really care about into the margins of my days while also trying to find time to relax, eat, sleep and shit*?

Aside from writing, writing, writing I am hoping to be able to get on the set of a friend's short film , shoot some episodes of a web show and learn enough CSS that I can wrestle a decent looking web page out of Wordpress. I'll doubtless write again at the end of these six weeks to say what the end result of my attempts is. Until then!

*I don't have time to pee! That is also something I look forward to in this sabbatical.
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Addendum: Holy crap this is pretty cool.

Also, here's my moment of punditry: Obama's got it and this seals the deal for me.

ArrrrrrRrrRRrrrRrRRrRrrrrt

It's just as well that I've got a packet of pictures to pony up - any time and energy I have for words is being hungrily devoured by writing projects! So without further ado...

A non-sponsored series of street art
A series that was sponsored and dictated by a Vespa manufacturer (POSSIBLY VESPA).
...something which irked at least one individual.
I'm not sure who made this, but given how long it has been around (at least a few months as I can tell) then I am guessing it was at least sponsored by the TTC or another government body.
Further down into Big Company Towne......we have the always ubiquitous and generally scorned "Corporate Art".
Q: Which art form is more valid?
A: None of this will matter after the Lizard Overlords finally reveal themselves.

Actually, I rather enjoyed Woody Allen's take on art in a book of interviews with him which I am reading: "Art to me has always been entertainment for intellectuals". Not to mention his take on being survived by his works: "...I'm not interested in living on in the hearts of my countrymen. I'd rather live on in my apartment!".