In which I explain my relationship with heights...

...from a great height.

Sorry Mom, but it's kind of undisputed!

HYDRA

Because this entry has many head(er)s, get it? No? Oh.

(That's okay, I don't either).

The Webshow Meet

So that went down on Monday. It had ups and downs and I learned a whole hell of a lot that I'm struggling to retain. That last bit may make me sound a bit dim but hoo dog did I have to eat a lot of alphabet soup (re: acronyms for things I'd never heard of before).

The actual amount of people that showed was pretty disappointing. It's maddening, but there doesn't seem to be any kind of real feeling of community amongst these sorts (in Toronto). I was particularly pissed to see that a person I know who complains regularly about this lack didn't show. Now, the people who did show were quality, but I cannot blame the organizer for getting disillusioned - though it didn't help that he'd had a terrible technical problem arise earlier in the day which looked to cost several hundred dollars to fix.

I gave my presentation, but it was as much for shits as anything else. Still, I enjoyed doing it.

The ups came from the fact that I learned a lot from the other presenter about what is happening regarding the government and it's views on "New Media", that loosey-goosey term for Innernet Stuuuuuf. I'm going to email the presenter soon and ask her if she'd be willing to send me a list of the names she mentioned so that I can then do a little of my own research and then try to spread the good work - for these names were names of people and organizations which are currently flapping their gums in a way which will have a profound effect on the future business viability of Canadian webshow entertainment. Expect more on that if I am able to get this in order.

I also made a pair of very useful contacts and for that, if nothing else, I'm glad I went. Here's hoping that the rough plan of trying again in four months, after more promotion, works out and I get a second chance to present to a bigger audience.

Nostalgia

It's no small coincidence that I've got an episode of the show on this topic coming soon. Lately I have been hip deep in the stuff. It's hard to say why, I'm pretty happy with stuff right now and I'm rather looking forward to what this year seems in order to deliver. I think that perhaps part of it is how quickly last year seems to have passed, but mostly I think it has to do with how cleary demarcated my adult life has been so far. My early twenties were DownTown Ottawa and then a very thick line was drawn between then and now, that line being Fourteen Months In London of course.

I don't know what's up with that, I don't know what's up with that but I reckon it's responsible for this wordy entry.

Cursing

People who know me would never accuse me of being the sort to go around sticking bars of soap in other people's mouths. Outside of certain contexts (i.e. teaching a kindergarten class) I think that words are just words and it's the way they are used that gives them meaning and/or power. Lord knows I certainly don't shy from crude or unusual and crude ways of expressing myself.

But I wonder, am I getting worse?

What stirs up these thoughts is something that happened as I was getting off the subway yesterday. I started to get out of my seat and the train shuddered in a way that led to me mashing my left knee on the handrest of a bench. This was pretty damn hard, hard enough that I had a noticable limp for the next fifteen minutes or so.

"Ow, fuck" I exclaimed as I excited the car. Okay, whatever. But then, blessedly out of earshot of anyone but without having made of point of being in such a space, I took a step that aggravated it and chased the earlier curse with "Fuck, fuck, fucking shit, fuck a child in the eye this shit hurts!".

Uh huh...this is probably nothing to worry about. I'm doing everything in my power to get to earning a living by my writing. I get bored with conventional phrases when I hear them come out of my mouth and so for that, and other writing related reasons, I often try to spin something a different way. Maybe that was a result of this habit? Maybe I just need fiercer cursing to register in my brain as cursing?

Maybe this isn't the thing to think about, but instead I should worry if I start saying that stuff so others can hear - well, others who don't know me well enough. I'm obviously not ashamed of it to the point I won't put this up on the Internet for anyone to read...

Urban Sexploitation

Last night I was taken on my second swing at Urban Exploration, although don't go getting impressed or anything as it was even easier to get into than the Brickworks. Basically I've had more trouble entering and risked greater injury by trying to enter a relaxed state of mind than this place. I'm being vague because I don't want to attract further attention to it, lest this lead to it being properly guarded or even locked. Why mention this shit at all then? Because of two reasons.

1) I was scouting a location to hopefully film in later this year.

2) It afforded me a sight which I found to be so awe inspiring as to be life affirming. That feeling is worth mentioning, if nothing else in this entire entry. There was something about the mixture of height and decayed decadence (anyone who's been there now knows where I mean) that played a tune

I hope things come together that I can then show you guys this place via the medium of fillum.

Beards

After being beardy since about mid-2002...fully bearded since late 2004...I shaved the whole damn thing off and plan to keep it that way for a while. "BIG WHOOP" you say "WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP" you inexplicably follow with...but it is kind of a neat thing, particularly when coupled with a new haircut/style. I'm now seeing a version of my face I haven't seen since before the second Iraq war. Drinking orange juice was livened up this morning when I actually felt it lap against my upper lip - when was the last time drinking orange juice surprised you?

To further hammer the point home, against my already pale skin I noticed that the recently debearded flesh was even paler for having lived in a hairy cave (uhhhh) these past years. Makes sense, but is odd all the same.

Just shut up and get on with it

Okay

BOOOOOO-TONNES

If all goes well, I hope to be selling these next week!

Ups, big

Posterchild clearly put a lot of work in this - it is easily my favorite thing by him in a while.